It is interesting to notice that an important part of the Bible is concerned with guiding us to have healthy relationships with others.
No doubt, God is interested in us living in peace with others and building healthy and fair relationships.
When we care for the way we relate to others and avoid toxic relationships, we also build up God’s plans to help people reconcile with Him.
That’s why today I’d like to share with you nine bible tips for having healthy relationships and avoiding toxic relationships.
Bible verse about healthy and toxic relationships
To do so, I invite you to read a small fragment of the Bible:
Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to your neighbor, for we are all members of one body.
“In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.
Anyone who has been stealing must steal no longer, but must work, doing something useful with their own hands, that they may have something to share with those in need.
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.
And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption.
Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.
Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
Ephesians 4:25 -32
Today’s Bible text comes from the letter to the church of Ephesus, written by the Apostle Paul.
In this fragment of the letter, the apostle is interested in encouraging them to live in harmony with one another.
From his words, we can extract valuable tips for healthy relationships.
#1 Telling the truth
The first piece of healthy relationship advice we are presented with is to always speak the truth.
An important foundation for building a healthy relationship is trust.
When we lie, we are teaching others that they cannot trust us, and in the absence of trust, our relationships become toxic and cannot flourish.
Even if telling the truth is difficult at the moment, in the long run, it will always be more beneficial.
#2 Don’t hold on to anger
Getting angry with others is perfectly natural in any real relationship.
Sometimes it even happens to us in our relationship with God.
I would venture to say that getting angry occasionally, and communicating it, is healthy for our relationships.
This is why the second advice we receive for healthy relationships is not to stay angry for long periods of time.
For our own sake, we should seek to process our emotions, and seek reconciliation and forgiveness as soon as possible.
If we don’t, our anger becomes cancer that ends up inviting us to revenge and causes our relationships to become toxic.
#3 Not to take from others, but to give
In our interactions with others, we should have an attitude of selfless service.
One who engages in relationships with the primary purpose of taking advantage and benefiting himself is manifesting a toxic and immature attitude.
For an adult relationship to be healthy it must be reciprocal, for this reason, the third advice we are given to avoid toxic relationships is not to steal from others.
Build our relationships on the basis of honesty and generosity.
#4 Talk upliftingly
The way we speak reveals much of what is in our minds and hearts.
As the wise proverb says, out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.
Taking care of what is in our hearts means that when we speak, we do so in a healthy, positive, and stimulating way.
Anyone can have a bad time and say things they shouldn’t in the way they shouldn’t.
Yet, instead of talking about vulgar, offensive, toxic, and trivial things, let us try to express ideas that add value to our interlocutors.
#5 Caring for our relationship with God
The fifth piece of advice we receive for healthy relationships is not to grieve the Holy Ghost.
All of our human relationships are somehow connected to a few primary relationships.
The first and most important of these is our relationship with God, followed by our relationship with our parents.
Our relationship with God is the most important of the relationships we have in our lives, not only because the way we relate to others depends on it, but because it has eternal implications.
In my own life, I have discovered that the closer I feel to God, the better and easier it is for me to relate to others.
#6 Controlling negative emotions
No one is exempt from experiencing negative emotions, however, clinging to emotions such as bitterness, rage, and anger negatively affect the health of our relationships.
It’s important to identify those emotions when they occur, understand that what you feel isn’t always real, and try to manage them in a healthy way.
When in our interactions with others we give way to brawling and slander, we are destroying respect and allowing our relationships to become toxic.
Controlling our emotions to treat the other as I would like to be treated is critical.
#7 Be kind
The seventh tip to healthy relationships is kindness.
There is no argument against goodness.
Anyone who has ever been treated with kindness can attest that this is a characteristic that captivates, builds trust, and tears down walls.
Asking God to help us be kind will result in us being able to treat others more warmly and peacefully, resulting in healthier relationships.
It will also give us a clear notion of what we should expect in the way others treat us, and set clear boundaries on what we can accept from each other’s treatment and what we can’t.
This will help us avoid toxic relationships.
#8 Be compassionate
Our eighth piece of advice for healthy relationships is compassion.
When we interact with others and are not willing to empathize with them, try to help them, and do them good, we are giving signs that our way of relating is potentially toxic.
Instead, when we exercise compassion, we strengthen bonds of trust and make the other person feel understood and supported.
This is a great achievement that solidifies the health of our relationships.
The ninth and final tip for healthy relationships is forgiveness.
I once heard a song that said “everybody hurts sometimes”.
Healthy relationships also require a degree of vulnerability.
Since we become vulnerable, it is natural sometimes to be hurt in one way or another.
Forgiving is a complex art that develops patiently under the mentorship of the only perfect teacher, God.
The Bible teaches that someone who is forgiven a lot loves a lot, having a forgiving attitude makes our relationships viable in the long term and stimulates love in our fellow men.
In the case of toxic relationships, reconciliation is not always the way, but just because it’s not healthy to reconcile doesn’t mean we can’t forgive.
Dear reader, God is interested in you having healthy relationships with others and avoiding being part of toxic relationships.
There is no other being in the entire universe who knows better what it is to maintain a harmonious relationship but God.
He coexists plurally within himself. If you give yourself the opportunity to walk with Him, He will not only teach you the way to make your relationships healthy, but He will give you eternal life and happiness.
I hope these words are a blessing to your life.
What do you think? How can we have healthy relationships and avoid toxic relationships? Share in the comments.
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A hug, God bless you.